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Laws to live by
Work jokes
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After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. --Lorenz`s Law of Mechanical Repair Identical parts aren`t. --Beach`s Law Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. --Anthony`s Law of the Workshop Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come. -- Tussman`s Law If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway. --Lowery`s Law The solution to a problem changes the problem. --Peer`s Law There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute strength and ignorance. --William`s Law Machines should work. People should think. --IBM`s Pollyanna Principle The most ineffective workers shall be moved systematically to the place where they can do the least damage. --The Dilbert Principle The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts. --Ehrlich`s Law It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry. --Ralph`s Observation If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire. -- Cannon`s Comment The newer the carpet the greater the likelihood that the bread will land jelly side down. -- Law of inevitable consequences.
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