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Steven wright 22
One liners
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The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. I had a dream that all the victims of The Pill came back... Boy, were they mad! The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney... I like to fill my tub up with water, then turn the shower on and act like I`m in a submarine that`s been hit. It doesn`t matter what temperature the room is, it`s always room temperature. I have two very rare photographs. One is a picture of Houdini locking his keys in his car. The other is a rare photograph of Norman Rockwell beating up a child. I went to the eye doctor and found out I needed glasses for reading. So, I got some flip-up contact lenses. Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug. I filled out an application that said, "In Case Of Emergency Notify". I wrote "Doctor"... What`s my mother going to do?
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