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Patient: I`m in a hospital! Why am I in here?
Doctor: You`ve had an accident involving a train.
Patient: What happened?
Doctor: Well, I`ve got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?
Patient: Well... The bad news first... Doctor: Your legs were injured so badly that we had to amputate both of them. Patient: That`s terrible! What`s the good news?
Doctor: There`s a guy in the next ward who made a very good offer on your slippers.

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