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New drugs for men
Medical jokes
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With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth
a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the
performance of men in today`s society.
DIRECTRA - A dose of this drug given to men
before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to
stop and ask for directions when they got
lost, compared to a control group where only 0.2
percent asked for directions.
PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug
were far more likely to actually finish a household repair
project before starting a new one.
CHILDAGRA - Men taking this drug reported a
sudden, overwhelming urge to perform more child-care
tasks-especially cleaning up spills and little accidents.
COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of
middle-aged men administered this drug noticed that their
wives had a new hairstyle. Currently being tested to see if
its effects extend to noticing new clothing.
BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men reported a
sudden urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts
after taking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen:
whether the drug can be continued for a period longer than
your favorites store`s return limit.
NEGA-VIAGRA - Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra.
Currently undergoing clinical trials on sitting U.S.
presidents.
NEGA-SPORTAGRA - This drug had the strange effect of making
men want to turn off televised sports and actually converse
with other family members.
CAPAGRA - Caused test subjects to become
uncharacteristically fastidious about lowering toilet seats
and replacing toothpaste caps. Subjects on higher doses were
seen dusting furniture.
PRYAGRA - About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave
men in the test group an irresistible urge to dig into the
personal affairs of other people. Note: Apparent over-dose
turned three test
subjects into special prosecutors.
LIAGRA - This drug causes men to be less than truthful when
they are asked about their sexual affairs. Will be available
in Regular, Grand Jury
and Presidential Strength versions.
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