|
|
Signs that you are too drunk
Bar jokes
Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.
Reviews : 0 [add review]
You lose arguments with inanimate objects. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth. Your job is interfering with your drinking. Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alchohol stream. Your career won`t progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat. You sincerely believe alchohol is the elusive 5th food group. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? I think not! Two hands and just one mouth.. - now THAT`S a drinking problem! You can focus better with one eye closed. The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar. You fall off the floor.. Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops. Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner! Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you. At AA meetings you begin: `Hi my name is.. uh..` Your idea of cutting back is less salt. You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. The whole bar says `Hi` when you come in.. You think the Four Basic Food Groups are Caffeine, Nicotine, Alchohol, and [Women or Men]. Every night you`re beginning to find your roommate`s cat more and more attractive. Roseanne looks good. Don`t recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass. That damned pink elephant followed me home again. I`m as sober as a judge. The shrubbery`s drunk from too frequent watering. You wake up screaming `TORO TORO TORO!` in the middle of the night.
Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.
Reviews : 0 [add review]
Previous joke
[ Bar jokes index ]
Next joke
Previous joke
[ jokes index ]
Next joke
More :
Popular jokes |
Most reviewed jokes |
Top Rated jokes
Reviews of that joke :
Reviews : 0, Rating : 0.00, 0 votes.
Post your review!
| |
|
|
Random jokes |
What`s the difference between a psychotic and a neurotic? A psychotic doesn`t believe that 2 + 2 = 4... Read this joke...
A blonde was telling Her priest a Pollock joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don... Read this joke...
|
Random joke |
Q: What does a blonde have in common with a noodle?A: They both wiggle when you eat them... Read this joke...
Exclamations:"Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!""Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit... Read this joke...
|
|
Random Funny stuff
Why are Democrats better in bed?You`ve never heard of getting a good piece of elephant, have... Read this joke...
Random pics

|
|